Hawai’i Bride: Bringing teacups from the mainland

Bride Interviews

Feb 12

Written By Angélica Rodríguez

Interviewing Ka’iulani Chamberlain about her wedding on the Island of Oahu.

Links of all vendors & attire linked at bottom.

First step in the planning process to find a cohesive look:

The first thing I did was narrow down the look I wanted to 5 words, and that helped me when making decisions. Pinterest is a great resource, but I knew I could get lost pinning everything that looked good. I would recommend trying to find the common design themes you’re loving, look at what you LIKE about the pictures, what draws you to them, and then have that guide you as you continue planning.

My 5 words were:

colorful, garden, intimate, high tea & laid back.

What was the hardest decision for you?

Nailing down a location was the hardest decision for us and we were very limited on what we could spend for the space. I knew I wanted to do it on Oahu, but we were thankfully able to find a spot that we loved and fit our vision.

Something unconventional you did?

We decided not to have a bridal party, and looking back I wish I was more intentional beforehand to thank everyone that helped. If a bride in the future is deciding not to have a wedding party, I recommend writing notes or something special for the day of. My friends did so much for us and I wish I had written something to thank them.

What led you to not have a bridal party?

People are paying a lot to come to a destination wedding, and I didn’t want the pressure of choosing a select group of people that paid for everything that came along with a bridal party. I didn’t want a bachelorette trip, or for them have to purchase a dresses. Those hundreds of dollars were already going toward the plane ticket if I’m being honest. We both have so many close friends and it would have been so hard to choose. Since the wedding itself was already on the smaller side, it just didn’t seem practical to make the audience that much smaller. The people at the wedding were our closest friends and family and truly the whole guest list could have been the bridal party. People are traveling thousands of miles to come and we just were so thankful we didn’t want to add any more pressure to them during that process.

Something you wish you’d saved money on?

This is hard to say, but I wish I had saved money on my dress. It’s hard, because you get so emotional when you are trying on dresses, but you really are going to look beautiful in whatever you have. The experience was one of a kind, and the designer was there when I tried mine on and helped tailor it for me, but it really was the expensive thing to do. I wish I had explored cheaper options. It looked beautiful, and I’m glad for the experience, but there’s a little regret because it’s just sitting in my closet and I got a second dress under $100 and I liked it just as much as my first one. That’s where I wish I saved money.

How did you decide on doing tea time instead of a meal?

Food can be really expensive, and we did appetizers and tea sandwiches. I went one yelp and looked at local farms that I liked on Oahu the I knew had connections to cooks and chefs and looked for personal chefs to create what we wanted. I was very upfront with our budget, and I didn’t want it to be too much. The timing of when you have the wedding plays into it. Since we had it earlier in the day, we didn’t serve dinner because it wasn’t around dinner time. I had 10 caterers turn me down, so you have to be okay with the rejection in the process.

Advice you have for couples considering opting out from providing a meal?

If you’re doing a late wedding, you’ll probably be expected to serve dinner because everyone is hung. If you do decide to have an earlier wedding and skip out out on a full meal, don’t worry about everyone else’s expectations. Hayden and I love little tea sandwiches and biscuits. I knew it wasn’t everyone’s top choice but it genuinely was something we were looking forward to and we liked. If you like Mac and cheese and pizza or a specific dessert, do it. Have fun with the menu and set it up to be what you want to eat, not what you think people expect. We loved the experience of tea time and getting to share that with people who hadn’t done it before.

Something you’re glad you didn’t do yourself?

I had the intention to do all the florals myself, and we live in Denver. I am so glad I didn’t, because even though I didn’t want a lot of florals, I still would not have been able to do it myself flying in from Denver. I was specific with what I could pay, and what I wanted. I ended up bringing 40 bud vases to the florist and just letting them know they could keep the vases or I could donate them afterward. We did 2 floral arrangements: my bouquet and the bud vases. I was very straight forward and totally understood if I was turned down. I just knew lots of businesses would be willing to work with me, but I had to be willing to find them.

Advice you’re glad you did not listen to:

I had lots of input on what I could and couldn’t do. Some people in your life are so used to a certain way of doing things that they’ll push back on anything they’re not used to. I was told there was no way we could bring 30 tea tiers and 120 teacups from the mainland ourselves. I was told I couldn’t thrift it all, that it was unrealistic. We brought them, it was hard and it took lots of time, but if you really want to do something, there’s no right or wrong way.

How did you get all the thrifted cups over to Oahu?

Our friends were life savers. They were willing to split up the tea tiers and put them in carry ons, bring candles, etc. People are willing to help as long as you spearhead how you want it to go or what you want that to look like. Make it happen.

Advice you’re glad you did listen to:

I was told to spend the money on catering and florals and I am so glad I did. It was great advice. We didn’t have a wedding planner, just the day of coordinator and friends who I had given templates of what I wanted to. I loved our floral shop and caterer, it was worth every penny and I wouldn’t change a thing.

Was there anything you’d do differently with your timeline?

I wish we had left more time to sit and eat our food. That’s on me, because I was the one that made the timeline. Everything was just so go go go that we didn’t sit for very long, and I wish we had enjoyed it a little more. It’s okay to just be sitting and listening to the music playing.

What are you glad you did for your timeline?

We had servers and we loved it because it helped with the flow of reception to not have to dismiss tables. We didn’t set time aside for Hayden and I to have time alone , but for us it was perfect because we really wanted to spend as much time as possible with friends and family since they had traveled so far to be there. We made an event we were actively looking forward to, despite all the stressors.

Something you wish you splurged on?

I wish I had invested in high quality envelopes and fun stamps, even though no one cares. I love that stuff, and I wish I had done electronic save the dates and used more for the actual invitations. I designed my own invites, and we had 3 sheets of paper, loved them.

Advice for handling stress before the wedding?

Definitely find someone who can be the voice of reason, because I personally had a partner who was okay with whatever I liked, but it was so helpful to have someone who I could run things past. I would get tressed and start obsessively scrolling and consuming wedding content and I needed someone to help me not spiral or go down a rabbit hole. This would be a wedding planner if you have one, but if not, find someone to go to. I obsessed over the candles for HOURS, but you need someone to give you constructive criticism and help you choose.